“I INHABIT MY ABSENCE”
—Tu Fu (712-770)
So much stronger than presence,
more spacious — I have not
plumbed all its shadowy depths
nor climbed its remoter peaks
No wind in the leaf-lorn boughs,
no voice calling my other name
houseboat anchorless, adrift,
my only lantern a new moon
Inhabit? — I haunt it, wear out
the rough-hewn planks, midnight
pacing — it is the only place
where I might have found you
CEDAR CHEST
I’ve forgotten what else is locked inside the cedar
chest from Singapore besides the prong-shaped key.
On the outside in carved relief, scenes of reunion
or farewell — a doorway, an archway, a wooden arm
extended from the huddled group of figures to the one
standing alone, garments flowing stiffly, branches
and fronds of leaves bending into a rigid wind. Towers
and a bridge define distance. On the end panels,
a solitary vigil — face at a porthole, moongate
or window,
staring out into curving lanes, stairways, half-formed
Chinese characters, mystic symbols. No locksmith
could yet unbolt their story, dismantle this brass fastening
to find what might be stored inside — creased linens,
crockery, read letters — our alibis for all that’s passed.
IN THE CHINESE LIBRARY
i
These shapes confound:
small lattices pulled
shut, their frames
delicately barbed, pavilions
with pointed rooftops
like sheathed knives,
half-moons among jigsaws
of tangled branches, stray
filaments of bamboo.
Looked at, they rise up
like flames, fling
antic arms overhead
as they climb the bindings.
I don’t wonder they are called
characters: they spring
to unauthorized life
even for me, the illiterate one,
the misinterpreter
for whom they spark
no synapses, bore no
pathways through the brain.
ii
A Ming painting
celebrates the lofty scholar,
high-minded
at his second-storey
window, while his wife
pounds grain
in the courtyard below.
Every morning he rises
in the dark, to write
a thousand characters
before the dawn
unscrolls itself.
Stroke by unhurried
stroke, he reinvents
the lapsed world,
brushes it
into its thousand shapes
and reinscribes it
in the ancient text
of memory, the rice paper
worn, frayed
in a thousand places,
the scholar aged
and undeterred.
iii
How shall I construe
these word-shapes: the mind’s
papercuts.
A snip here or there
unfolds
a forest of black trees in snow.
I will read them
as the ancient ones
read cloud or spoor.
I watch as you
scan them casually,
then look up a word:
I will translate you
by reading mostly
what is cut away.
iv
This room beggars me.
I know the peasant’s
hunger, sidelong glances
of the scholar’s wife
as I confront
this spatial language,
each ideograph a box
like the carved
cedar chest from Singapore,
its pronged key
locked inside
the unseen cavity.
No skeleton to pick
this mystery, no cipher’s
master code, nothing
but labor grueling
as the peasant’s
or the wife’s, numbering
each separate brushstroke,
prying open
each sealed door.
v
The hand that first
inked these dark
markings, strokes
of fortune, luck
or paralysis, midnight
lightening, genius,
was perhaps a lover’s.
Away from his beloved,
he thought in shapes
of moonlight, moon gate,
a ginkgo tree stark
in an empty field.
He let his brush glide
along the flowing scroll,
a boat without oarsman.
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